I need a[nother] job.

I've been looking! For real. No one is f-ing hiring. Its like the only positions open require you to have at least 5 years experience writing about something random, like tree frogs. Where the hell do you get 5 years experience doing that? Oh, and that's just for a part time position. WTF?! So annoying. Sorry, I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir here.

In the meantime I think I'm going to apply to be a tutor at Minnetonka High School (yes, my high school's rivals). I'm sure there will be some upper middle class parents who need a tutor with an expensive degree so their child can also go to an overpriced college. No, I'm not bitter or anything. stupid carleton calling and asking me for money.

My job with Foss is going well though! On Monday I got my first manager evaluation. It was terrifying cause the manager watched my last lesson of the night (I teach 8 classes on Monday nights and it gets pretty crazy by the end). I also get really paranoid when the people working there watch me and she had this stone face the ENTIRE TIME. So I kept thinking I was totally bombing my lesson and teaching this kid to drown and not swim. Turns out she was floored by how well I did. She gave me a 91 (the goal site average is a 93) and first time instructors rarely get above an 80! How cool is that? Its only been like 3 weeks into the session!

Last night I signed up for tots and swim team training. So then I can teach the parent-baby classes (I'm really just doing it so I can play with the cute babies! yay!) and then I can help teach the swim team level kids (which is what I already have experience with).

Oh, btw...I went to Carleton for the weekend and saw the new dorms. They're ridiculous. They are more like apartment buildings than dorms. Apparently Memorial has been dubbed "The Bro-tel" because its occupied by almost all guys. Also the townhouses are almost all girls so its earned the moniker "Sorority Row"...sounds like we got out just in time, eh?

Side-note: My photo shoot pics have been posted on Facebook. I know some of y'alls wanted to see them. :] Here's one of them...props to my friend Ashley for her fantastic make up artistry.

So European

Well, unfortunately, in spain when they say that Internet will be available in two days, they actually mean twelve. So I am still internetless at home, but have found a great coffee shop with wifi. I tonly costs 1.30 for a ridiculously deliciious coffee, or only .45 for wine. So either way, it's a win-win situation. The best part is, they usually project random music videos on the walls (last week was a James Brown marathon).
So far, there is little to update about Spain. I like my housemates more than I was expecting (they are very different from you carleton folks, but still enjoyable). My schools keep pushing back my start date (still have two weeks free). They actually said, if I want, ic an come in a give a brief presentation about myself... whenever I want, for as long as I want... if I want. ridiculous. I also was given the schedule for the school year. Not only do I have 4 days weekend every week, but there is at least one 10 break for every thrity days (10 days off for Marti gras, 2.4 weeks for easter, plus random Spanish holidays thrown in there). I am not sure how I will ever be able to handle a 40hr/week job once I get back to the US.

So I pass the time exploring the city and admiring various european fashoins. Not only do all men (and some women) sport the infamous mullet with dreadlocks look, I have seen other piece of equal interest (like wearing overalls, but as shorts (hooking them together so the top flap hangs at your knees) or wearing skinny jeans (in the legs only) with a huge baggy bottom... like a giant diaper). Or, when I was walking along the river at 10:30pm and passed a man jogging barefoot... and completely naked. Like completely. It just keeps getting better.

I have been out clubbing and salsa dancing, etc. It is crazy how late everyone stays up here! Even old people (and there are sooooooo many old people! I seriously don't understand how spain can support them because all they do is walk, bench sit, and hang out at cafes. Definitely going to retire here.

Well that is that. I am supposed to maybe have internet sometime next week (keep your fingers crossed!).

I found the place I want to die

Someday in the future. For once, it wasn't murder.

Ever read books on the moors? The Secret Garden, Wuthering Heights, you name it. Project the image of the lush, whispering scene on your eyelids outside of you and there I stood today, as the wind thrashed against me. The emotional sibilance of the moors, and every color of the palate darkened to the point at which you can physically and mentally respond to it. The clouds blazed with fire, the way the edges of paper orange before the black. It was the place (if time/energy/Lost were to converge) where Captain Planet really makes it happen; fire in the sky, water beckoning in the distance, earth subdued and waiting all around, wind tearing at you. My gosh, Mike Kowaleski's Spirit of Place ought to come here. Australia and New Zealand have nothing on this niche in the valley.

It doesn't make sense on paper, but if you were here, there's no way you wouldn't get it.

The late entry

Hi everyone! I can't believe I'm the last one to get on board with something that everybody else in our friend group is enjoying. That's so... freshman year...

Well, I'm in NYC and have been for about two weeks, so I think I've forfeited my right to a long, detailed post about moving to the city. I'll substitute this Limited Attention Span-approved post of tiny oddities that I've noticed in the past couple days.

I'm currently living in East Harlem, which has apparently gotten a lot nicer over the past few years but is still rather widely regarded as a "shithole" by many New Yorkers. It is what you expect, with lots of graffiti, homelessness, and people who lean against dark buildings and stare at you during your entire walk down the block. There is also predominantly Spanish spoken in the streets and so much fried Mexican food in the area that I think I gain weight breathing, but I'm not Carolyn so that doesn't really do it for me (Zing! From six time zones away!). I have a room in a cozy, cozy apartment that always smells of weird spices right next to the Corsi Housing Project, namesake of our good friend Ryeon. Amy came to visit me this past weekend, and while she was very polite about the living conditions, we both can recognize that it's not ideal. However, until I can move to another area, let's take advantage of the situation and play Anthropological Tourist White Kid!

There is a poultry slaughterhouse one block down from my apartment. Apparently the freshest meat you can get, anywhere. Several times a day, they hose out the floor of the warehouse-like space, flushing into the sewers whatever blood and feathers escaped cleanup. Walking over that is fun. I was told that the tap water in Harlem contains bacteria, and I have to buy gallons of spring water. I wonder if this is not somehow contributing to that.

Every vendor in Harlem offers you a straw with your beverage, no matter what it is. I've bought water, they offer me a straw. Gatorade? Straw. Sierra Nevada 24oz IPA? I declined, but was offered a straw. I've seen folks (like my housemate) drinking 40oz Colt .45s out of a brown bag, using a straw. What's the appeal? Nobody likes foamy beer!

As I've told Amy, I fully plan on getting mugged at least once before leaving NYC. However, to prolong that mugging until I've finished my Muay Thai training (yes, there is a gym here in Manhattan and yes, I'm going to train [Life's goal accomplished, right?!]), I am going to blend in with the crowd. That means instead of tight, cuffed pants, Pumas, and an ironically bad T-shirt, as would be appropriate in the Upper East Side, I will buy some huge jeans with a dragon embroidered on the back pocket, a hooded sweatshirt with an unpopular sports team logo, and I'm going to get a buzz cut except for the last half-inch of hair on the nape of my neck, which I will allow to grow out. Fuck yeah. Ain't nobody going to mess with Andrew "Harlem for life" Widmer.

But! Pizza is plentiful and phenomenal in Harlem. A plus!

That's good for now, right? If you made it to the end, thank you! and I will probably post again in another two weeks. Don't worry, though, because I check it far more frequently than that and I do like to read about our collective exploits! Love you all, and I miss you. Come visit sometime after I'm established elsewhere, and we will have much fun!

The third first day soon to commence...

The most terrifying (as Amy/Leah/Katie will attest to my pre-Americorps trepidation) of which being when I moved in and smiled and nodded for a week with weird non-sequiturs splashing into random conversations. I, too, am awful at smalltalk, I've realized upon meeting new folks.

P.S. Amy -- the algol really sucks. I can't support it.

The second, less scary, meeting the other houses.

Finally, tonight, the last twinge of anxiety settling into my heart before I meet with my supervisor in Provincetown. I'll be serving with the Conservation Commission (i.e. planning/building community gardens, preserving wildlife sanctuaries, and enjoying things like Leatherfest) and with the town's disaster preparedness/emergency response team.

There have been 3x baked goods every single day I've been here. One today was chocolate chip zucchini bread. Katie, you would have loved it.

Anyway, I want to leave this sporadic post with the following (rewritten) song from High School Musical 1 (formerly the "Wildcats" song. Youtube it to get the tune. Then sing-a-long!):

"Watercats"

Together, together, together everyone!
Together, together, let's go have some fun!

Water is in Cape Cod
It's a solid,
A gas,
And it is a liquid!

Water is in Cape Cod
It adheres
It coheres
And it has surface tension!

Water is in Cape Cod
DEN-SI-TY
When it's fresh,
It'll float on saltwater!

Water Sing-a-long!
It's got three phases goin' on!
Water's on the ground!
Evaporates up and rains back down!

We also had a dance. It took us 30 minutes to write and choreograph. We then won a small stuffed animal. We had no science majors in my group.

First of all, anyone who puts "Boobies" on their license plate IS definitely a douchebag - that is disgusting! Although, I think I have seen that license plate in the Carolina too - were you procrastinating by looking on a license plate registration website or something? That could be fun...

Second, I've officially made it through half a semester of law school! Still loving it. I met up with an old high school friend who is applying to med school here and I think we're going to end up being actual friends now instead of, what I would call acquaintances back in high school. Have you guys noticed that at all? People who you used to know, but weren't really friends with now seem like really cool people and you wonder why you didn't see it earlier?

Anyway, Halloween lives on here much like it did at Carleton! The law school, med school, business school, and pharmacy school all get together for a Monster's Ball. Some of my friends and I are going to go as the "Supreme Court," but not in the judicial sense, rather the home-coming court sense. I'll be "Miss Trial" and another will be "Miss Demeanor" etc...I can't wait.

Additionally, while I did not buddy up with Dale Earnhardt like Amy, all of the first year student got treated to free food (including sushi) and an open bar on the roof of a high-rise downtown with the largest law firm in South Carolina! Turns out the big wigs are just like us - they will take any opportunity to fill up on free stuff and will not hesitate to, um, have a little too much. My favorite lawyer was a guy who looked like Tom Fry at age 50! He had the hair that Tom had freshman year, but it was pure white and it bobbled in the same way. Then he put on these black sunglasses ('cause it was sunset) and I got this weird Tom Fry/Tom Cruise vibe that made me crack up. Needless to say, law school has cut down on my drinking quite a bit and so after three reasonable glasses of wine, I woke up with a slight hangover; what???

three quick things

1) I hope you have all seen this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zkaqPHiIrE

2) Yesterday, I got my hair cut by someone who spoke no English...it was quite the adventure, and turned out surprisingly well considering the language barrier.

3) Maybe I just like the letter E, but since coming to new york, I have noticed some funny license plates (which I assume are not done on purpose):
egg
ehh
eek
eww

and then completely unrelated and entirely on purpose: boobies (the owner of this licence plate may be the biggest douchebag in all of NY since he is the only person in the state with this license plate and he must have paid to have it)

Is it time to blackout?

MAYBE!

HOPEFULLY NOT!

PROBABLY HAPPENED A LITTLE BIT LAST NIGHT!

Last night, I fell off of a ship on which we were illegally trespassing. Imagine: there's the dock, the ship, and the gap of space between the two (where the water is). I fell off the side of the boat and I landed on my butt, with my feet dangling off the dock, as if I were sitting. It was really funny at the time, but looking back, it could have been bad news.

I also just squeezed a splinter from my finger. From the tree climbing frenzy that took place.

My friend also told me that I was "the oddest person" she's ever met. HOLLA!

Wow

So I made it to spain, and found an apartment within in 2 days! Actually, i mooched an apartment from three girls who were already here and looking for a 4th roommate. the place is nice (big kitchen, heated porch) but my room is windowless and TINY (I didn't think they could get smaller than musser). The best part is the rent is like 125 euros cheaper than I thought I would have to pay, which means more travel plans for carolyn!

Bilbao is a strange town- very big geographically but it feels small. People are ALWAYS walking the streets at all hours of the day and are extrememly friendly (but speak so quickly!). I have a week or so before I begin teaching, so I just explore and try not to spend money... well, I don't get internet for 10 days, but expect an update then.


ps
I know what you mean now, Rye. the people here are nice, but its definitely not carleton anymore.

pps
decent wine for under 2 euro. YES!

ppps
if you ever want to call me, it is free for me to receive calls from skype (and only 2 cents a minute for you) Just search for a spain number and type: 699291164. Call me anytime day or night (keep in mind six hour time change from east coast) I miss you all!

pppps
I will be in NY Dec 18th... I hope we can all meet up somewhere near by....

Its like my ipod's stuck on replay.

I hate being a blog hog, but I couldn't wait to post this...I found Andrew Olson's twin! (See man in upper right corner of picture)

Well, actually Adam found him like months ago, but I kept forgetting to show everyone and then I totally forgot about it. lol. Anyway, this guy plays guitar in a band called This Providence (who are actually pretty decent).

Seriously, I think he looks just like him except with long hair and hipster clothing. Hahaha!

Just imagine him in a wig having just shopped at Anthropologie--do they sell men's clothing? I'm never in Maple Grove. Their myspace page has more photos of him wearing things like the requisite striped American Apparel v-neck. :]

A classic emo-esque music video for your viewing pleasure:



And on that note, I'm off to see AFI tonight. LOL.

Use those SMEYES.

As I type this, I must periodically warm my hands because it is so freaking cold in my house!! My dad won't turn the heat on just yet so I have to use like 3 blankets in order to not die in my sleep...

Anyway, my friend Ashley has been going to makeup school for the past month. This week is her last week, and she needed a model for her portfolio. So I agreed to help her out and went out to a professional photo studio in Minneapolis. There were models for the other 8 artists so this was a 9-5 deal. I modeled two looks "glamour" (which was kind of retro/pin-up) and "high fashion" (dark and intense colors).

For my high fashion shoot the photographer had me pose in the dusty stairwell of the building which had all this exposed brick--really industrial setting. Way cool and less awkward than the glamour shoot where I had to stand in front of a plain background while everyone watched me. Not to mention there was not much room in the stair well which resulted in much less poking and prodding and hair spraying between frames. My hair was hard and crunchy from all the stuff they kept spraying (practically pouring) on my head. lol.

The photographer was an interesting guy who asked me if I would teach him how to swim and would occasionally shout "THAT'S THE SHOT!" or "THERE WE GO!" or even "NEW FACEBOOK PHOTO!" over the top 40 R&B that was blasting. Nothing like working it to "Single Ladies" or "Unbreak My Heart." All I can say is thank goodness for shows like ANTM or "Make Me a Super Model" for teaching me how to pose...cause apparently I'm pretty good at it? I think its all in the 5 inch heels, really. I get to keep the photos, which is pretty cool. (Too bad I don't get paid though.) Ashley got 2 of the pictures right away, and we get the rest in a couple weeks! :]

Adventures At Lunch

So like last week or the week before, there was a prize wheel set up at lunch in the cafeteria, and like if you spent 7 dollars at lunch you got to spin it. I never spend 7 dollars at lunch, but it just so happened that that day, I accidentally put this 60 cents per ounce oriental chicken on my salad…and so I got to spin the wheel and won "dinner for 2...6 tacos." I had forgotten about this until I recently found the receipt in my purse. So being that I am incredibly cheap, I decided to take advantage of my free tacos today. So I got 3 of them and went up to the register only to find out that I had to get all 6 at once (and I wasn't ready to forgo 3 of my free tacos). So I go back in line and order 3 more tacos (which got me many funny looks). Then the second time I went to the check out, the cashier laughed and said "enjoy all your tacos" quite loudly as I was leaving…

Back at my desk, I noticed that the salsas that I grabbed have different names based on their degree of hotness. Mild = "Will you scratch my back" and Hot = "Will you marry me." Now I didn't get the next hottest level, but I'm REALLY curious as to what it could possibly be...

Then upon further investigation of the salsa (I had grabbed about 20 of them for my 6 tacos), I realized that they said different things, one of which was "Ahhhhhh...we meet again" and another slightly more disturbing: "Help! I can't tell where I am. It's dark and I can hear laughing." Who the hell writes these???